Life is all about plans… plans plans plans, blah blah blah… BORING. But true. I mean, just think about your life. The schedules, the meetings, the requirements… Blackberry phones, date books, planners, iPhones, computer calendars. It never ends. We are obsessed with busyness, with knowing what is coming next in life. Even if unintentional, we fill up our schedules so that we will either be in the presence of other people or to make some kind of agreements or plans. Classes, workouts, dinner dates. How often do we just sit down and take time for ourselves? How often do we take time to just sit and realize that we don’t need those schedules, those plan books, and those calendars to make us feel worthy? We fill up all of our empty time so that we rarely have the chance to think about how unimportant our plans actually are but really how unforgettable and irreplaceable God’s plans are.
In the fall, I began to think about the future. Well, not just the future in general, but my future right after graduation (December 2010). I didn’t know what I wanted to do at all… I knew that teaching jobs probably wouldn’t work out because it was halfway through a school year calendar and the last thing I wanted to do was be a substitute. I thought, “Well, maybe I could just move home with my parents and find an odd job until I got a teaching position someplace”, but that also seemed unappealing. I thought about it a lot and began praying. I wanted God to start moving my heart in the direction that he had planned. I asked Him to open up doors for me and close the doors of things that He didn’t want for me. After some time, I began considering going abroad. I have gone on two mission trips to Romania and I know a part of my heart is still in that country. I thought about spending a few months back in Romania and helping out with the mission organization I worked with on those two previous trips. After a couple more weeks, I began considering Discipleship Training School (DTS) with Youth with a Mission (YWAM). A few of my close friends in high school graduated early and spent a semester abroad doing DTS. DTS is basically Bible College abroad that not only helps you grow in knowledge and understanding of the Gospel and who God is, but it also trains you in an area of ministry of which you are interested. I have been involved in some sort of ministry since middle school, so I figured that maybe God was calling me to missions or ministry beyond graduation. I began looking at different English speaking (yep, that’s right, English speaking… I should have stayed with French, gosh dang it) DTS programs around the world and began emailing the different coordinators to gain more information. I looked at programs in Amsterdam, South Africa, France, Scotland, England, Australia, and Togo. I still wasn’t sure if this was exactly what God had in mind for me, but I figured, there was no harm in at least getting practical information. I kept praying and praying and praying but was still unsure.
Then I remembered a name: Randy Brooks.
[[Randy Brooks is the Overseas Director for SPCF (South Pacific Christian Fellowship), a Christian Church in New Zealand. SPCF focuses on the raising up of leaders in the Church to start new Church plants in the South Pacific, an area of the world that is often times overlooked by missionaries. They also appoint leaders and missionaries to struggling churches in this area of the world to figure out how to build back up. In August, Randy came to the church I volunteer at in Omaha and spoke about the mission in New Zealand. I even had the opportunity to talk with him about it one-on-one later that day.]]
I didn’t know why his name came to my head or why, all of a sudden, New Zealand was lying heavily on my heart, but I continued to pray. I journaled a lot, talked with numerous people about it, and was still unsure what to do. After a few weeks of what some would call “overanalyzing”, I decided to email Randy. I re-introduced myself, expressed my interest in doing something with SPCF, and asked him if there was any need for an intern. A couple weeks later, he told me he would look around for opportunities… now it was just a matter of waiting. Patience… something I have been trying to get better at. Well, a couple weeks later, he emailed me about an internship opportunity with ReChurch, a branch new Church plant in ChristChurch, New Zealand. The next day, I was emailed the internship application from one of women at ReChurch. I spent the next week looking over their website (Check it out: www.rechurch.co.nz) and intentionally praying for ReChurch. Praying that God would reveal the plans He not only had for me but for this church as well. Praying for their future intern, praying for strength and growth for this new church plant, prayer that I would be driven by HIS plans and not mine, that God would reveal what he truly wanted me to do after graduation, for courage and patience and trust. I need to trust more. Yep. Plain and simple.
I still felt God tugging at my heart… encouraging me to do this, to apply to ReChurch, to be their intern. So I did it… I filled out the application and sent it in. I spent the next couple of months trying to trust. Trying not to just rely on my own plans but to really evaluate who God is and continuously making the choice to give everything to Him. It’s not easy. At all. If it were up to me, I could plan my future in my datebook, writing down specifics and details so that I could, along with everyone else that seems so content with their future, understand exactly where my life was going. But, I didn’t want that. I didn’t want to say, “Oh, I have known exactly what I’ve wanted to do for a long time and I am doing it.” I would rather say, “I don’t always know where or how things are going to go, but I do know that God is faithful. If I am faithful to Him, I will be just where I am meant to be. God always has new and exciting things for my life... and I can't wait to see where He takes me next.”
Well, I got the internship. Right now, the dates are February 1, 2011 to July 31, 2011. 6 full months in New Zealand? I never suspected this... but I am so happy and so thankful. I can't wait for God to reveal to me exactly what I'll be doing there. I can't wait to meet everyone at ReChurch and form relationships with those people. I can't wait to see how God moves. I could try to picture it in my head, but I know that He is so much bigger than anything I could ever imagine.
Please continue to pray for me.
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